DISCIPLINE

In the book One Day My Soul Just Opened Up, Iyanla Vanzant gave a very interesting discussion about this concept. Discipline she said, is an orderly or prescribed conduct or pattern of behavior. She further said that when it comes to doing something that you need to do, you will either do it or reap the consequences of not doing it.

I think Iyanla and I have shared the same sentiment about discipline. When God showered to the whole world discipline, both of us were at the mall!

I find it hard to incorporate this concept in my life. No wonder that from my 98-pound figure when I was still working at Far East Bank, and my 110-pound weight right after my radio active radiation in 2003, I find it so frustrating that whatever I do now I could never pull down my weight to at least 120 pounds. I was always telling friends and acquaintances who were so surprised to see me now that it was because of my hypothyroidism. It is partly true because my metabolism slowed down radically that even if I don’t eat a lot, my weight still continues to soar higher. But then I knew better than that. I knew that if only I have discipline, I could actually beat the effect of my hypothyroidism by religiously taking my medicine and by spending longer period of time to exercise.

For years, I would shamelessly gobble up the food in the table, would forget to drink my medicine, would spend time watching TV instead of joining my friends in playing badminton, then when it is time to face the mirror, I would shamelessly exclaim “What the hell happened to you?!”

I was so frustrated about myself, I missed the times when I could eat the food that I would want to eat then still look sexy, I missed the days when I would walk around Baguio City without feeling tired or without complaining that my feet hurts and that I was having trouble catching my breath. I missed the years I was in my school’s DBC, I miss the days when I could wear anything I like to wear and get away with it. I miss feeling good about myself. I miss honoring myself and the life given to me.

I didn’t know that the simple issue of gaining so much weight could affect the way I would look at myself and my life. I used to imitate that Dove soap model (the chubby lady) who would say, “O kahit mataba ako, maganda naman di ba?” What a loser I had been. I manipulated myself into believing that I never felt any insecurity while I watch my body bloat.

One day, (just recently) after I vowed to give up feeling sad, I also said “l will start feeling good about myself!” And the best way to start it is discipline. My friends decided on a daily schedule of playing badminton and I promised to meet them after my work in Legazpi and after traveling 62kms. from Legazpi to Sorsogon. I would play twice for 2 hours on weekdays, and 3 to 4 hours on weekends. Last night was the longest time I played. I started playing at 4:30 pm up to 9:30 pm, though I have a few minutes rest in between sets. I am already reaping the fruits of my labor because just today, I was able to wear the skirt I haven’t worn for months because it could no longer slip through my thigh.

Discipline. It is my way of honoring my life. It is my way of honoring myself. Above all, it is my way of honoring the one who gave me life. The simple task of employing discipline in my daily routine brought healing into my life. It taught me to love myself.


A Dose of Vitamins for the Soul

My car pool mate told us a funny story about discipline. A man in a motorcycle who is a typical Pinoy overtook the van she was riding. I said typical Pinoy because the man had a helmet not on his head but on his elbow (is there a better way to call him than stupid?) When the van reached Pauline’s bookstore near Albay Cathedral, they saw the man in motorcycle sprawled on the sidewalk, with blood oozing from his forehead. Can you guess what happened to him? Your guess is not as good as mine! It so happened that while he was maneuvering, the insane man who by-stands near Pauline’s and who always have a huge stone in his hand saw him approaching. Upon seeing him, the crank just threw the stone in his direction and lo! Hit him right on target! The moral of the story? Wear your helmet not on your elbow but on your head! Because you’ll never know what circumstances nature can use to teach you the hard lesson of discipline! ©